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GPG1919
Post subject: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 2nd, 2016, 11:15 pm
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New here, but have read many, many posts from real designs to non-ship bucket drawings.

So here is my AU shipping line established around 1908, with its first two ships the RMS Isna and the RMS Cora. The paint scheme is based off the White Star in the late 20s with the yellow/gold strip lower.

The Cora was built more for passenger service than the Isna which was built for passenger and cargo, the shipping line was advertised more towards 2nd and 3rd class passenger

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bezobrazov
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 3rd, 2016, 2:51 am
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These show great promise!

However, one thing that strikes me immediately is the absence of hull sheer! That makes them look very flat, pretty much like flatiron.

I also think the second mast should be taller; in fact both from the W/T aspect and aesthetically all three masts should be raised!

The floatplane aft would also benefit from slightly more attention viz. the angle and sheer.

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citizen lambda
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 3rd, 2016, 9:05 am
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These look good for a first drawing. The overall layout and the hull shape and shading show promise indeed.
I just have a few additional remarks on the drawing and design:
- Does the bridge make sense like this, without any open spaces or visible wings? Do you plan on adding something later on, or am I not seeing something that is already here?
- The masts and cranes could probably use some work, at least aesthetically. The masts themselves can probably afford to be straight, and if you can, the cranes would look better with more detailed connections to the masts, both for the crane arms and the pulleys. Right now the pulleys seem to be floating about and the arms welded to the masts.
- The main deck looks flush with the hull, and from the shading, the deck above seems to be wider still. Is this what you had in mind? Is this safe re. stability and docking?
- If I see correctly, both variants have portholes abeam the cargo holds?
All in all great work, keep going!

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Shigure
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 3rd, 2016, 9:53 am
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I want to sink this with my AU cruiser

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Keisser
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 3rd, 2016, 10:45 am
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TristanAlting wrote:
I want to sink this with my AU cruiser
What if it's gonna be reworked in commercial raider, than sneaks directly to your CA in the dakest hour and than - BOOM! - ?

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Keisser
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 3rd, 2016, 10:47 am
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Damn, that's a good idea... I will make a commercial raider drawing from this... If GPG1919 would let me do it, of course...

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Shigure
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 3rd, 2016, 11:25 am
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You might get in one shot, but then my gunners are awake and bombarding the crap out of you.

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Keisser
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 3rd, 2016, 11:56 am
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TristanAlting wrote:
You might get in one shot, but then my gunners are awake and bombarding the crap out of you.
Joseph Burnett (HMAS Sydney captain) thought so, too. Never underestimate commercial raiders power :twisted:

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GPG1919
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 3rd, 2016, 5:29 pm
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Keisser wrote:
Damn, that's a good idea... I will make a commercial raider drawing from this... If GPG1919 would let me do it, of course...
I did design this more for speed having WWI in mind.
citizen lambda wrote:
These look good for a first drawing. The overall layout and the hull shape and shading show promise indeed.
I just have a few additional remarks on the drawing and design:
[A] Does the bridge make sense like this, without any open spaces or visible wings? Do you plan on adding something later on, or am I not seeing something that is already here?
Right now the pulleys seem to be floating about and the arms welded to the masts.
[C] If I see correctly, both variants have portholes abeam the cargo holds?


[A] - If you mean that I have the bridge entirely enclosed then yes, and I have wings on the bridge, I just have them extending to A-deck.

- The pulleys and hooks I borrowed from previous designs and tried to follow using those designs mainly Novices' Carpathia.

[C] Yes there are portholes, but as with any ship that serves both cargo and passenger it is designed to use optimal space. This ship is borrowing the design of both the smaller Cunard ships (Carpathia) while still promoting its self towards a White Star sort of liner.


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Novice
Post subject: Re: AU Corona LinesPosted: June 4th, 2016, 11:50 am
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Welcome aboard SB GPG1919!
Your ships look promising, and most of my criticism has already been mentioned My addition will be concerning general layout of your ships
1] For an early 20th century ship, you'll need a lot of ventilators, in the area of funnels and behind, These had two purposes, one drawing air into the boilers, and to ventilate heat from both boiler rooms and engine rooms.
2] Bridge structure is too extensive, and continuous. It needs to be smaller and more divided, and adding some more details.
3] Since you have used my RMS Carpathia as a reference model for your ideas, please note that your masts need to be both thinner, and higher, especially the second and aft one. The aft mast on the Isna looks bent, and all derricks are too high up on the masts.
3] First lifeboats, near the fore-funnel. It looks like the smaller boat is hanging out.
4] All the hull portholes should be outlined in black, not some gray color.
5] The shading on your superstructure is too dark. I think it is white painted, so you'll need to tone down the shade.

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